More Pineapple Tidbits
- Good news, I know EXACTLY what to get Marcus Vick for his birthday this year. A throwback Lawrence Phillips Nebraska jersey!
- I love Herm Edwards. Nothing like a career 39-41 coach that carries himself with the esteem of a 4-time Super Bowl champ. His "straddling the edge of insanity" act during press conferences and his priceless quotes about keeping things "in house." As if there is huge demand for insight about what went on behind the scenes of the 4-12 Jets this year. If you are too lazy to refer to a Webster's dictionary to find out the meaning of "delusions of grandeur", just watch coach Edwards at work.
- Let me get this straight. Bernie Kosar made a name for himself with his uncanny ability to read and pick apart NFL defenses even at the young age of 23. Despite limited physical skills, he carved out a decent pro career by simply being the most intelligent game quarterback in the league at the time. And yet he has never once been offered a position as an offensive coordinator somewhere? makes sense...
- In his three seasons with the Houston Texans, Domanick Davis has run for 3195 yards and scored 28 touchdowns. He missed a few games this year due to injury, but in 2004 he rushed for 1188 yards, caught 68 passes for another 588 yards and reached the end zone 14 times. And the Texans have already decided on drafting Reggie Bush despite seeing David Carr's confidence and potential diminishing with each snap? makes sense..
- Speaking of Bush, with LenDale White's recent announcement of his professional intentions. Do you realize it will be back-to-back years that one school will put two running backs in the first round of the NFL draft (Auburn's Ronnie Brown and Carnell Williams went last year), simply amazing.
- I've been trying to decide what to say about the Indians concluding their free agent season with the inexplicable signing of Todd Hollandsworthless, but I simply cannot have that many four letter words on my website...I just won't do it.
Instead, I'll let my friend Shnydes sum it up in an excerpt from an email he sent to a friend back home:
"As for the Indians they suck and you can tell Grandma i said that! The White Sox are going to kick our asses everytime we play them! I hate to be so negative but Dolan Needs to sell the team! He is a cheap ass and the fans give him a pass! Byrd is injury prone.. Jason Johnson isn't better than Scott Elarton! They didn't get another bat.. they let Millwood and Bobby Howry their best relief pitcher walk.. We'll win 84 ballgames if were lucky and the fans still support those losers! I'll watch from afar but i have better things to do! They had they're chance last year and they choked! They didn't address the needs of the team! They signed a bunch of stiff pitchers who were good 10 years ago in Karsay and Graves! Well Graves is an appropriate name because that's the type of baseball Cleveland is used too and next year will be the same! I feel sorry for all of us because we will all be dead by the time any Cleveland team wins! I guarantee it! The City is a black Hole and it sucks the life out of you! "Woe is me" is the theme.. Until People boycott the games and demand a winner it will never happen! They can say all they want about how this is a small market... BullSHit! This team sold out 5 straight years.... Dolan is ripping off the Fans! I'm done with that stuff.. Auntie Shirley do me this favor, do a lot of traveling and riding in your boat in Sandusky this summer because I want you to enjoy yourself and don't get caught up with those losers at the Jake! I'm sorry to write all of this but it's the Truth and I'm not much of a bullshitter anyways.Seriously anything less than a WORLD SERIES, NBA TITLE, or A SUPERBOWL is unacceptable! We've waited all of our lives! Damn It we Deserve it! I will not accept Mediocrity any more!"
All I can say is I could not have said it better myself and I'm glad there isn't a tax on exclamation points.
- I love Herm Edwards. Nothing like a career 39-41 coach that carries himself with the esteem of a 4-time Super Bowl champ. His "straddling the edge of insanity" act during press conferences and his priceless quotes about keeping things "in house." As if there is huge demand for insight about what went on behind the scenes of the 4-12 Jets this year. If you are too lazy to refer to a Webster's dictionary to find out the meaning of "delusions of grandeur", just watch coach Edwards at work.
- Let me get this straight. Bernie Kosar made a name for himself with his uncanny ability to read and pick apart NFL defenses even at the young age of 23. Despite limited physical skills, he carved out a decent pro career by simply being the most intelligent game quarterback in the league at the time. And yet he has never once been offered a position as an offensive coordinator somewhere? makes sense...
- In his three seasons with the Houston Texans, Domanick Davis has run for 3195 yards and scored 28 touchdowns. He missed a few games this year due to injury, but in 2004 he rushed for 1188 yards, caught 68 passes for another 588 yards and reached the end zone 14 times. And the Texans have already decided on drafting Reggie Bush despite seeing David Carr's confidence and potential diminishing with each snap? makes sense..
- Speaking of Bush, with LenDale White's recent announcement of his professional intentions. Do you realize it will be back-to-back years that one school will put two running backs in the first round of the NFL draft (Auburn's Ronnie Brown and Carnell Williams went last year), simply amazing.
- I've been trying to decide what to say about the Indians concluding their free agent season with the inexplicable signing of Todd Hollandsworthless, but I simply cannot have that many four letter words on my website...I just won't do it.
Instead, I'll let my friend Shnydes sum it up in an excerpt from an email he sent to a friend back home:
"As for the Indians they suck and you can tell Grandma i said that! The White Sox are going to kick our asses everytime we play them! I hate to be so negative but Dolan Needs to sell the team! He is a cheap ass and the fans give him a pass! Byrd is injury prone.. Jason Johnson isn't better than Scott Elarton! They didn't get another bat.. they let Millwood and Bobby Howry their best relief pitcher walk.. We'll win 84 ballgames if were lucky and the fans still support those losers! I'll watch from afar but i have better things to do! They had they're chance last year and they choked! They didn't address the needs of the team! They signed a bunch of stiff pitchers who were good 10 years ago in Karsay and Graves! Well Graves is an appropriate name because that's the type of baseball Cleveland is used too and next year will be the same! I feel sorry for all of us because we will all be dead by the time any Cleveland team wins! I guarantee it! The City is a black Hole and it sucks the life out of you! "Woe is me" is the theme.. Until People boycott the games and demand a winner it will never happen! They can say all they want about how this is a small market... BullSHit! This team sold out 5 straight years.... Dolan is ripping off the Fans! I'm done with that stuff.. Auntie Shirley do me this favor, do a lot of traveling and riding in your boat in Sandusky this summer because I want you to enjoy yourself and don't get caught up with those losers at the Jake! I'm sorry to write all of this but it's the Truth and I'm not much of a bullshitter anyways.Seriously anything less than a WORLD SERIES, NBA TITLE, or A SUPERBOWL is unacceptable! We've waited all of our lives! Damn It we Deserve it! I will not accept Mediocrity any more!"
All I can say is I could not have said it better myself and I'm glad there isn't a tax on exclamation points.
posted by Jon Sladek at 9:56 PM
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